The Wife As Navigator
(Hear the Audio Form of this
(Back to Vignettes: Table of Contents)
When God said, "It is not
good for the man to be alone; I will make a helper suitable for him"
(Gen. 2:18 NAsv), He revealed that man is not complete within himself.
"Alone" means "incomplete, a part but not the whole." God's provision
for wholeness was Eve, a helper suitable to him.
In our experience, the major area where a man is
incomplete is in understanding and navigating his relationships with his
wife and family. While most men pride themselves that they handle
relationships from a logical, factual, rational point of view, their
wives often say their husbands are clueless and miss most of the heart
level dynamics. And in so doing, they make a mess of things.
In counseling couples, we often see the husband
diligently, intently, and sincerely trying to find within himself
answers and solutions for the problems in their relationships. It never
crosses his mind to ask his wife, even though she's tried many times
before to help him see what's going on. His help is not within himself
but is sitting beside him, in the person of his wife.
As he looks within himself for answers, he tends to
shut her out. The result is that he renders himself "helpless," meaning
"without help in himself; destitute of the power or means to assist or
If he will humble himself, and open his heart to his
wife, he will receive the help God has provided him through her. And he
and his wife can work together with God to resolve conflicts, heal
wounds, and get on with the business of doing life together.
(Back to Top)